Interrupted Dinner

I was dicing onions to go into potato salad when my older brother Ralph came in the back door. I immediately stopped and ladled Miracle Whip into the bowl because I preferred its tangy taste and knew he would want it made with plain mayo. Ralph considered himself to be a chef, thanks to abundant compliments from other relatives. He frowned when he saw the jar on the tabletop. “Why did you use that crap?”

I stuck out my tongue. “Cause I’m making it. I didn’t hear you volunteer to do it. You copped out by choosing to go out to buy corn on the cob.”

Mom came into the kitchen. “Will you two please stop arguing . Your dad will be home soon. Hope he’s in a good mood.”

She sat down and rolled up the skirt steak then skewered it. After adding sweet pickle juice and stirring thoroughly, I tasted the salad then refilled the spoon and gave it to Mom. “Does it need more salt?”

“Mmhm, just a dash. Is the water boiling?”

I checked the large kettle. “It’s bubbling.”

Dad came inside, whistling “Boogie Woogie Bugle Boy”. He kissed Mom then went into the bathroom to wash up.

Ralph put the corn into the pot, Mom put the sheet of meat under the broiler, and I set the table. As Dad sat down, I asked him, “Coffee or milk?”

He smiled. “It’s hot. Is there any tea in the fridge?”

I nodded, filled a tumbler with ice, then handed the cold pitcher to him.

It became quiet in the kitchen after we filled our plates with food and started eating. I had just buttered a second ear of corn and was shaking salt on it when I became aware of a brilliant light in the backyard. Though my hands were greasy, I held the right one up to shield my eyes. “What the hell!”

Blam!

The back door slammed open. Something larger than a human entered. Gleaming white. Metallic. Red glowing eyes. It clanked into our kitchen, followed by two small grey aliens.

Dad bellowed as he stood and turned.

The robotic leader blasted him with a stunner.

We were all encapsulated in a mist, then went up and through the roof. I could see the ground as we rose into the air. I was so freaked that I lost control of my bladder then passed out.

I became aware I was strapped onto a metal table. The android stood at my feet with three alien figures around my upper torso. I tried to move but could not. A grating voice said, “Hello Donna. Remain still while they finish an important procedure.” It motioned for the others to continue, then firmly grasped my left foot.

It said, “I think you have forgotten me. I am Roxie your personal guidance counselor. It was past time for your check up. Should have been done last summer but your family didn’t go camping at Morrow Lake in Michigan.”

I shrieked as it pinched my ankle.

“Took awhile to find you so now you will be chipped. Isn’t that what you humans do to dogs?”

Its chuckle made my skin crawl. Feeling a sharp pain behind an ear, I passed out. Roxie still stood there when I awoke. Its voice was a monotone drone as it gave me orders and told me to forget everything from today.

Next thing I knew my family was again seated at our kitchen table. Ralph asked, “Does something feel weird?”

In a shaking voice, I said, “Yes. Why are you sitting over there? Why am I in your seat?”

He shook his head. “Dunno.”

Dad looked dazed. “Rita go buy a 6-pack please.”

Mom scowled. “Go get it yourself.”

“Don’t think I should drive.”

Ralph said, “A beer sounds good. I’ll buy a case.”

Mom and I had the kitchen cleaned by the time he returned. Dad had gone outside and lit a fire in the pit. I pulled wine coolers for me and my mom from the fridge and joined them in the backyard. Looking up at the star-filled sky, I asked, “When did we go to see the hot air balloons at the Kellogg air field?”

Dad scratched at the stubble on his chin. “Bout ten years ago. Right, Rita?”

She shrugged. “Not sure. Wasn’t it in ’80 or ’81?”

Ralph belched. “I was twelve last time we went to Morrow Lake. Why did we quit going there?”

Mom said, “The Olson’s sold their cabin.”

Dad said, “Was a bit odd how fast they sold it. Greg would not even consider my offer. Said it was because Donna had poured apple juice all over his robot. What was it called?”

A chill went down my neck as I said, “Roxie.”